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« Fragility of life | Main | And the flip side »

January 26, 2009


Amanda Too

I'm so glad she's recovering well. I'll have to remember the foot/hand massage strategy when I have a loved one in hospital.


Glad that she's moving in the right direction. Here's to the next phase. :^)


I was there for her post-op recovery, and we did indeed squeak loudly. Mom was begining to decompensate until I put my organizational judo into high gear, getting the to the right people to break the 'authorized' routines. No problem - I'm good at that sort of thing, and teh staff there really are excellent and caring.

One thing with mom - She has limited boundaries. Most of the time, she does a good job of remembering that fact, and consiously maintains a semblance of normal boundry behaviors, but when she's on drugs, well, all that good intention goes right out the window. Sobeit. Right now, she gets cut some slack.

In general, she's feeling her mortality, and whilst she'll deny that it's the first time for this, this time, she isn't as young as she once was, and that hunk of titantium and delrin in her hip is a concrete reminder that she *can't* get back to where she once was - Not ever - no matter how successful the surgery has been (and it HAS been a major success); Forever more, she's quite literally not all there, and she knows it.

Life has an end and she knows that too, but she's just now coming face to face with her own decreasing ability, and it hasn't been a happy experience for her. In a way, I wonder if the way the family has pulled together for her hasn't accentuated that fact rather sharply? As usual, we've pulled out the stops, and give ostentatious support, and that may have underlined the situation just a bit to clearly for her. Perhaps it might have been better for us to have let her struggle a bit more, overcome a bit more, and thus allowed her a victory over herself and her situation. Sure, it'd have been an illusionary victory, but comforting none the less. Instead, she's been in the glaring spotlight, and while she loves that spotlight, it does kinda highlight things that might have been more comfortably left in the shadow.


In the end, she'd rather have the uncomfortable reality, I think. She'll be able to adjust in a larger single step, and while it means stumbling on that step and skinning her knees painfully, once she's up it, she's up it (or down it, as the case may be).

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