responding to Cathy's comment...
I was actually going to say exactly this - that I am not sure what age-appropriate for 42 is, and that it isn't easy being 42.
Case in point, me losing my cool utterly yesterday (okay, not screaming and throwing things, but NOT in control of my feelings and their expression) when I found out the elder kids (including niece) had used up an entire LARGE container of fox pee (to keep the woodchuck out of the yard)... a container that cost a good chunk of change (there goes my budget for next year's bedding plants, chopped in half!), and that normally lasts me more than a year. In one go, gone.
And yet - they were totally considered and thoughtful about where they put it. They attended to the important plants, the beds of flowers, their gardens, the places where the bugger might get into the yard. They put extra around the burrow entrances (two, both in our yard), including doing a good job of getting at the one that isn't easily accessed by an adult. They put it exactly where I'd have put it, plus some places that probably didn't need it but I could tell that they'd thought it through anyway.
They just used too much. And it still really hurt to know they hadn't looked at the price tag (nice and big on the front - but did they know to? no). And it hurt that I will end up paying the consequences for their enthusiasm (but they didn't know that, either). And I wanted them to have read the instructions (3800 linear feet... do we even have that much space in our yard? and would they know what a few ounces is?), or to have called me if they weren't sure - but they thought they WERE sure how to proceed, so how could they have understood they were not? I also wish that as each of them cycled through a little discomfort about the plan, they'd pulled back the reins on each other, checked in with an adult...
And all that is still age appropriate for them. What I wish most is that I'd not assumed that they grasped the 'how', and had given clear instructions, rather than saying 'you can put some on the plants' and pointed to one area (thinking 'these plants, here' but not saying it). It comes down to my own damn fault, primarily. A mistake, with good intentions all around. And we all know what they say about good intentions, not to mention assumptions.
And beyond that, I wish I'd been more age-appropriate myself... what is age-appropriate at 42? And yes, it's hard being 42, too.