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July 01, 2008

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Madeleine

When Snuggly Girl turned 3, two different family members sent pretend doctor's kits. I guess they knew it would be the year of non-stop "Sick Baby" whenever the 3 y.o. downstairs came to play.

Now, at almost-8, she tends to go hyperbolic, too. I'll be thinking of your approach with Mr. G.

hedra

@Madeline, Parent Effectiveness Training; Raising our children, raising ourselves; Respectful Parent, Respectful Child (I think that's the title) all have the method detailed out. I didn't even follow it entirely - I could have reflected more before answering the other two questions, and it probably would have been even more useful. Sometimes it feels silly to just reflect and say NOTHING else, but... it keeps working, so I end up smack in Effective Prudent True - it works, it works cleanly, there appear to be no negative repercussions (fewer indeed than other methods), and it does match my values (empathy, kindness, honoring emotions, respecting personal power)... so, I keep ending up there again.

Tranq

Ah, yes. Age-Appropriate Behavior. My daughter has done "Goth" on me. A bit early, but then, she's always been a bit precotious. Oh, well... At least she does it with *style.* None of this grungy, dingy look. Oh, no. Re-invented pseudo-Victorian, or as close as she can get. Think "Stevie Nicks," but with better taste.

Of course, there's the Manga obssesion, too - RIGHT on schedule! Goth Manga look? She's tried it on. Didn't work so well. So, some days, she's Gara, and some days, she's... I dunno who. Herself, I guess. Well... She's ALWAYS herself. Just some days, it's a bit more obvious than on others. ;-)

The one that's got us scratching our heads, though, is that she's hit menarch. Now that is NOT age approprate - not typically, anyway. She's pretty far early on that one. The funny thing is, she's handling it FAR better than her mother. Is maternal vapor-lock "age appropriate" behavior? :-D

Marita

Annie is just past 5yo and we've started to experience the lies. Is interesting what she considers important enough to lie about.

Beate

I love your writing and always learn from it. Can I make a request concerning the layout of the text? Can you increase the line spacing as well as the character spacing? Both would help make the text more readable. Thanks for considering it.

hedra

@beate, I'll look into it. I'm not a fan of narrow san-serif fonts in the first place (age-related visual acuity issue for me!), but I'm not sure how to make the layout do that. I'll check.

Meanwhile, you may be able to change the settings on your browser to increase font size or force the font, though it may mess with the layout a bit.

(the professional technical communicator says, 'um, whoops! I'm always telling OTHER people to do that, professionally.' :wince: )

Cathy

Interesting topic. Right now, we're working through what is age appropriate and what is beyond age appropriate for the 14 year old in our lives.

The story with Mr. G is giving me flashbacks to my experiences with "snot bubbles" from the now 14 year old crying so hard when he was, um, like 8. Maybe early 9.

In recounting the misadventures to my work friends, I frequently end up with the line, "It's not easy being ___." And then I think, "It's not easy being 37."

Madeleine

@Tranq, how old is your budding young woman? I just got a book from the library for my almost-8 y.o. which says that anytime from 8.5 to 11 is common for start of some puberty symptoms, and first period mostly between 11 and 14. "But some girls are only nine or even younger."

The book is "Ready, Set, Grow" by L. Madaras. She has another book for older girls also. It's pretty thorough but straightforward, and aimed at younger girls. The overriding message is "early, late, or in the middle -- you are normal. Normal, normal, normal."

Tranq

@Madeleine;
She's 10.5, going on 14. ;-)
Yeah, I knew it was possible, but wasn't truly expecing the begining of menses for another year. We've got the book "The Care & Keeping of You: The Body Book for Girls," on hedra's recommendation. Seems spot-on, if not scintilating. I'll look up your recommendation, too - thanks!

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