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June 11, 2008



Wow, insightful post, as always. I've actually just been learning about this in a class (Politics of the Developing World). I also found it really interesting that people revolt more often not when there is perpetual poverty, but when there is rampant poverty, then economic growth, then a collapse back into poverty. As you said, it's the hope lost that causes revolution. I never thought of how that would play out on a micro level, even though I can think of instances where it's been true in my life.


Right now, I'm coming down off the hope high, so I really needed to read this. My daughter has been in treatment for feeding issues for nearly two years (she just turned four), and we are at a new OT center - a place and a group that triggered a lot of hope for me.

It was, I think, because the OT shows a lot of hope, most notably in her goals statement. My first red flag was when I read the goals and found myself wondering if she wrote them so ambitious because of insurance coding or if she really believed it possible. I asked her. She believes it. I have reserved my judgment until some more time has passed, but frankly, I think she's in for a shock.

This is a long way around to say that although I never wanted to give up hope, if giving up hope is the key to unlocking real progress (or, more likely, some honest to goodness peace in this house about food), then I hope it's close. The working, working, working is exhausting and not yielding a great effort to result ratio.


@amy, do you have the Ellyn Satter book(s)? Worth a read if you don't. Good luck. It's a long slog and worth the slogging that hope allows you to pursue. And then worth letting go, too. I know the emotional mangle involved. It isn't fun. I'm glad for the progress we got while we did it (even the dregs were useful later), but when the progress stopped, and stayed stopped (it was no little plateau, it was a flat-line), it was good to let it go, too. You have my sympathies.


I do have the Ellyn Satter book you mention in the post, but it's shelved. I bought it more than two years ago, and I remember crying my eyes out and being furious to the point that I couldn't finish it. My complaint at the time was that the book presumes that the child eats some things, and at the time, my tot did not consume anything that wasn't a fluid (or almost fluid). I will pull it out again this summer once I've finished what I'm reading right now (Raising a Sensory Smart Child). I will try it again now that she eats a bit and I'm less vested in what other people think about what I've done or haven't done as a parent to create this situation.


Yeah, she IS dealing mostly with the 'typical range' issues. It was mainly the philosophy that is a bit different.

It also won't work for kids who CAN'T eat for medical reasons, though there may be aspects that can be borrowed.

Between what you're reading now, and her book, I hope you find a path you can all live with.


Thank you for the kind wishes and the good direction. The philosophy underlying Satter's work is important - it was the strategies that made me feel ouchy-ouch. The key to making the Satter stuff work for us might lie in what you just said and what we just learned: "It also won't work for kids who CAN'T eat for medical reasons" + it looks like the tot has an oral motor deficiency that would explain, oh, almost everything.

Thanks again!

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